mellon collie and the infinite sadness

As i was growing up, i got heavily interested in female domination, in many of its forms. That used to be a seperate trait of my personality. I'd always seperate that from the rest of me.
Now? Now, i'm 31 and those boundaries are not so clear anymore.
So, rediscovering myself again.

A dark soul, tortured by life itself writes about his demons. That’s my definition of an artist.

You know what’s the best compliment someone can give to a musician? Tell him how his music makes you feel things.

My love for Vic is beyond words. Who else could write such a song? Thank you Vic for writing this song. It makes me feel things. Makes me understand just a bit of what you went through in life.In 5 minutes.

Bad news incoming

teamviewer

I love the idea of having someone I barely know log in on my computer using teamviewer, spying on my stuff, and doing some minor modifications. I find the lack of control appealing.

Optionally, maybe you can show me your feet on skype (different computer) so that I get distracted from what you actually do on my computer.

Yes, you can disable my keyboard or even black screen me, just as long as you don’t delete anything or do anything too invasive (those 2 are limits).

I will tribute you before we even start.

Why not do this? (Newbies more than welcome too)

skype: gore_easter

kik: underherspell

Foot tales: a reflection

I just saw a video on a local very popular video/journal site, about a reporter interviewing members of the local BDSM scene. I recognized a lesbian couple that I met some years ago (see http://melloncollie81.tumblr.com/post/39877589344/foot-tales-pt-2-the-lesbian-couple). They are now probably the best name in the local business. I can’t help but recall some of the tips I gave them when I first met them (I was actually the one who got them into that, let alone the first one to worship their feet). They did them all and them some. They are probably filthy rich by now. OK, maybe not, but I guess they need a new house to host their shoes/clothes. Every girl’s dream, right?

The most interesting thought though is that I read in an interview of them last year how they were impressed by my foot worshiping skills. The truth is that I wasn’t that much into that! So, it wasn’t nearly as passionate as when I worshiped Princess’ feet. I think the obsession I had with her and her feet must have pushed me into an unreal worshiping frenzy unlike anything I’ve ever done. In a way, I wish I could experience what she experienced, see what it feels like to have someone go insane on your feet.

Also makes me think, how much will it suck for her when another guy will worship her feet. Can’t switch to lettuce after you had a fillet mignon, right? :P

Studying to this.

Yep.

I can see through you

I’ve been online far too long.

I know you already. Even if we’ve never talked before.

I know all about your insecurities as a Domme.

I know when you’re being confident and when you cover that behind a wall.

I know when a tribute excites you even if all you say is a cold ‘Thanks’.

I know when all you want to do is take the tribute and disappear. Sometimes my horny state makes me weaker than I should, but I really know about it. Maybe sometimes I hope that treating you with kindness (even when you don’t deserve it) will make you re-evaluate.

My knowledge comes from observation of hundreds of cases.

Do you really think you’re any different?

Maybe 1 in a 100 is different. The rest of you aren’t.

Is that bad? No.

But I like you knowing that I know how you think. Isn’t that an interesting thought?

Have you ever thought of going all “Fuck this, I’ll text my super vanilla ex and tell her that I’d pay her to touch and kiss her feet”?

Just for the lolz

Wow

What a year…

No orgasm or a ruined one?

Guys, this question is for you. Suppose you were teased and brought to the edge over and over again and then given the choice of either a no-orgasm or a ruined one.

What would you pick?

Wow

I had the most powerful orgasm of my life last night, under Her commands. If I was renting my place instead of owning I’d have been kicked out today for complaints about my late night screaming :P

Oh my fucking god. I can’t even feel my things down there. She is amazing. I’m so lucky to have her. Even in this, frustrating/remote, way.

sissycumzalot:

drip drip drip 

sissycumzalot:

drip drip drip 

In other news, I’m definitely not doing good. I can be fucking honest here because nobody cares and that’s good cause I can really speak my mind.

Lately, after a serious bad break up, all I have is her. She knows how important she is to me, after all she made me confess my plans to finish my studies here, move to her country / city, get a job there and ask her on a date out. She didn’t made any comments but knowing her, not calling me an idiot is probably a good thing. She’s way too cryptic for a girl and I know she likes me even though I’ve been fucking up a bit lately, mostly annoying her.

I want to take a small break. This excruciating orgasm denial is not doing me any good as I obsess more and more about her and I’d rather keep it healthy. I’m taking a week off trip to a pretty european country in 2 weeks, I’ll even see an “ex” there that we’re on great terms. That’ll do me good. Besides, how more weak can she make me? I’ve already promised her everything she wants. What bothers me though is that she doesn’t realize how difficult I’m. Only she makes me like that and she doesn’t know because, well, she’s not everyone else :P

I’m super motivated, only because I want her. What will happen if any of those goals fail? That’s a seriously depressing thought. I spent too much time last night thinking about killing myself. More like a funny way to do that, but that worries me enough to i) write about it and ii) do something about that.

I’m optimistic though, because I know what I am capable of. Wish me luck.

I had to go through a very painful denial session last night. Princess unlocked me, had me stroke for a while and when I begged her to cum she had me stop. Did that a couple more times and asked me to get locked back up again.

I begged and pleaded to cum and she told me to ruin it instead since I’ve been fucking up a lot lately. I begged again and her last call was to send me back into chastity without any kind of orgasm.

I’m in pain.

What would you do guys? Would you choose a ruined orgasm over getting back locked up?

You’ve never came for free, why start now?

Her, during one of our chats.

Oh god..

Because you can never have enough chastity belts! (cb3000, cb6000, bon4)

Because you can never have enough chastity belts! (cb3000, cb6000, bon4)